Saturday, March 31, 2012

A Reflection

Today I sit in the shade of a tree starring out at the deep blue ocean as it stretches all the way out to where it meets the horizon and I know it.  I have a love affair with the pacific ocean.

It's big and bright and eternal.
It's wild and free and independent.
It's cold and refreshing and revitalizing.

The fresh wind off the water breathes life into my soul and makes me dream again.  All this and yet at rest.  I could stay here all day peacefully resting.

I'm sure psychologists could say so much about me based on this, a full personality profile even.  They would be right.  As the waves roll in, so does a perfect reflection of myself.     --March 24th

The memory of me..

I have lived in many places.  Each place has had a unique part in my life.  As I visit places I used to live, I see myself in the memories people have of me.  It is never the whole me they see or expect but the part of me that grew while I was in that place and in that time.  It is a disappointment because these memories do not hold all of me.  I visit many places but it's always the same.  Where can I go to find all of me?  The place where my experiences and deseos and all that is me lines up?  --March 20th

Reflections from the road

This week I got back from Peru.  After two years away, it was a good and necessary trip but oh so exhausting.   I did have a a couple of moments to think and enjoy silence.  Here are some thoughts that I had as I was leaving....

March 16
The first time I moved to Peru, i was a mess.  Literally.  I was doubled over in pain and couldn't stand up.  Melly Mel and laura had to help me to the car and get me to choke down tums.  i got on the plane and fell asleep.  i was so tired i didn't realize the plane sat at the gate for two hours while I slept. The pain in my tummy wore off but my nervousness and excitement did not.  I was ready to "change the world."

I got there and it was so different and so strange.  I felt lost and unknown.  Time wore on and it became my home.  Today, I'm heading back after two years and my question is this:  will it be home or unknown?